Life is messy.
Our entry into this world is a messy business in itself, which I suppose is just symbolic of all else that is to come, as it causes someone (i.e: our mother) severe, near intolerable pain, in order to birth new life.
Life is messy.
I’ve really been wrestling with the concept of suffering as I’ve asked God why He allows certain things to happen (or when He allows certain things to happen), and to be fair, I don’t have the answers.
However, there’s something I’m slowly beginning to grasp as I wrestle with (and through) suffering.
Truth #1: God is good.
Indisputably. He is good. His character, regardless of circumstances, remains the same, and that truth is constant. God is good.
Truth #2: Humanity is fallen.
Our world, once destined to be good, whole, made in the image of a good God, has fallen so short of His purposes. Because of this, our world is filled with things that God did not intend for us–evil, suffering, disease, the list goes on.
Truth #3: God is sovereign.
And again, God is good.
Every time I see a picture of my mom lying in the hospital bed where she lived for two months, cancer invading her brain, her body, stealing her health, her way of life, her life itself, I question God. I ask Him why. Why did He allow cancer to slowly steal her life away until she took her last breath and left us?
Then, I remember Truth #2. This is not what God wanted for her, for us. We live in a fallen world.
I accept that. I understand that.
Then, why was this our reality for seven months? And why is it a reality for others for even longer only to end with the similar story of more suffering culminating in last breaths? Why didn’t God do something about it?
God is sovereign. God is good.
“Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.” 2 Corinthians 4:16-18
Truth. Truth. Truth.
Truth #2: We are wasting away, fallen human bodies deteriorating in a fallen human world, afflicted by diseases like cancer.
But…Truth #1 and #3: God is sovereign, and God is good.
Eternal life. Eternal glory. Hope.
I still don’t have all the answers, but I am learning and choosing to trust Him each day.
And maybe this seedling faith will one day be a mighty oak, but it can truly be said of this soul that anything good here is by His grace alone.
Here’s to truth in the chaos, His goodness found in the yucky mess we’ve made of the world, and the promise of redemption.